BE YOUR OWN CHEERLEADER

WEEK OF 10/26/2026

 

When it comes to teaching kids, we have all sorts of great advice for the parents in how they can maximize the “ride home” and strengthen the development made in class.  But in many ways, we also have these same conversations with ourselves.  It can be helpful to reframe our inner dialogue a bit so that we, too, can maximize this experience.

You already have coaches.  But do you have cheerleaders?  Be your own cheerleader!

I don’t normally write more practical articles but I figured it was time to throw some actionable stuff out there.  One of my secrets to longevity in this sport is just having the right perspective, and not beating myself up too much.  Trust me — your training partners already have that one covered.

So here goes:

SET THE TONE FOR YOURSELF

Remember — we should look forward to training, not feel performance anxiety.  That’s for the stage, not the mats.  We’re not competing with anyone but ourselves, and learning new skills is fun and exciting — even when we get it a little wrong.

So don’t beat yourself up if you screw something up or make a few missteps.  Focus on what you learned, and the hard work you’ve invested in yourself.

BE A STUDENT, NOT A COACH

You have coaches.  Their job is to critique your technique, push you past your limits, and keep you on the right path.  So let them do that, and allow yourself to be a student.  Being a student means you don’t know everything, and that you won’t always score 100% on the tests.  That’s ok.  That’s how it’s supposed to be.

You don’t have to run through every mistake on the ride home.  You don’t have to gameplan on how to improve.  You just need to make sure you show up next time, ready to work and ready to learn.

REFRAME YOUR FOLLOW UP

There is no “winning” or “losing” in practice.  There are no outcomes outside of growth.  That’s it.  Training = growth.  So focus less on how you did and more on your experience.  What was your favorite part of the day’s training?  What new skills did you learn or refine?  What challenged you?  What did you do well?  What do you want to focus on for next time?  Checking in with yourself is a great way to positively frame your training and set yourself up for a great session next time.

GIVE YOURSELF A PAT ON THE BACK

We all love to feel like the “big dog” in the room.  But prioritizing your ego comes at the expense of prioritizing your growth.  And when we focus on growth, we seek out the challenging partners and we don’t cut corners.  So give yourself a pat on the back.  That’s not easy to do, but it’s worth it.

HAVING A “BAD” SESSION DOESN’T MEAN YOU HAD A BAD SESSION.  THERE ARE NO BAD SESSIONS.

Not every class is going to be great.  We don’t value ourselves, or our training, based on our most recent session.  A bad day doesn’t make us a bad athlete, and a good day doesn’t make us a real killer.  Good days, bad days — they’re just days.  Our job is to accumulate days.  On average, half will be “below average” in terms of performance/feel/etc.  That’s just, quite simply, how it goes.  And that’s one of the most important things to keep in mind.

There are no bad days.  There are just days.  Seek them out!

MAINTAIN PERSPECTIVE

Be honest with yourself and your goals.  You may be training alongside actual championship level athletes.  How they perform, and what they need to do, will often be different than what you need to do.  You probably don’t have a fight in the next six weeks.  You can afford to slow down and enjoy the process.  You can afford to not stress yourself out over every little detail.  You can afford to have fun.  Longevity is the name of the game.  There have been many, many people who have been better than me.  But I’ve eventually surpassed most of them, not because I am good or talented, but because I simply stuck with it.